Today was a bad day. -Lewis

I went to the pictures today. I went to see a film called Tower Heist. Saw Tower Heist, I say see Tower Heist. It actually has its moments aside from the face that Ben Stiller is in it. I don't like Ben Stiller.
But we're drifting off of the topic. The topic is 'I FUCKING HATE EVERYBODY' I was in Cinemas hating all the fucking cutesy couples sucking face and looking meaningfully into each others eyes. I hated the fucking chancy pieces of shit that made me move because they wanted to sit with their shit cunt friends. Then there was the 3 12 year olds in front of us. Who would just not shut the fuck up. These fucking people. I hate them so motherfucking much. Every time they spoke I kicked their chair as hard as I could. Little cuts. Who the fuck pays to see a film and then fuckin talk through it.
There is a special place in hell for those mother fuckers. Just as Shepherd Book says in Firefly.
Then when we're filing out of the cinema and towards the tram, there was just so many fucking annoying little children fucking about. Those of you who've ever seen my twitter know I'm an angry person anyways. But when you throw children into the equation I just fucking lose it and want to swing at them with a machete. My one wish of the day was for the pricks who were playing on the tracks, running around and being ignorant and cuntish for them to not be able to get off and just get absolutely smashed by the fucking tram.
My god. So full of angry.
So I've been sitting at home sulking and stewing in my own filth. I've managed to create a make shift cocoon out of my duvet and snuggled up in it in front of the tv. I'm blogging now as my Playstation is updating to 4.00 apparently.
Listening to my favourite podcasts.
Wreckless Media Radio and Red Bar Radio. If you don't know about them I definitely suggest you give them a listen. They make me so happy and laugh until my tummy hurts.

Well. I do kinda feel a bit better now I've typed my heart out on my iPod. So again. Sorry or any grammatical errors or Mis-spelling of anything. Have a nice night guys.
I'll probably post tomorrow since im apparently the only one thats been persistent.
Sam and Oli are just too busy sucking each others nipples or something.

Anyways. I'm going to play Uncharted 3 now. Good morrow.

Holy fucking shitballs.

Yeah. I understand why you is raging to. I know what it's like getting called a faggit all the time for doing certain things that other people see as strange or foreign to them, an like actually used that as a reason to not like me. But oh look. Everyone now has long hair and stretchers and wears big shoes. Why is everyone such a massive fucking faggit.
And nigga please. I hope you're not pointing the finger at me for not ever playing morrow wind or fucking Oblivious. Bitch I will cut you where you stand. Ive played all of the Fallout and Oblivion games. I've got a bare a nerd boner for Bathesda etc.

I agree with what you're saying about oli's facial piecings. Fucking conformist. Mwah ha ha ha.

I'm watching Dog Patrol. It's about fucking retards who get stopped at the airport for wangling cigarettes and cocaine. And then lying about actually having it in the first place. People are so fucking stupid it makes me upset. It really really does.

I don't really know what games I'm looking forward to soon. I'm kinda eager to play the new Deus Ex. As that was one of my favourite games on the ps2. It was fucking right good.

Anything else to add guys? Sorry of grammar and spelling is off, I'm doing it from my iPod as my fucking wankberry won't let me post. Like a dumb little slut.

Tatty bye.

Sam's angry gaming blog-ette of the day.

Another day of avoiding any real work, and spending my days wearing silly hats, playing videogames, and listening to music. There's an elitist rant coming up, so you might want to tune out for a while. Don't read this if you don't give a damn about vidyo' gaemz yo'.

Let's say, I go to a certain shop, a little out of town. The shop specialises in selling what I need. I've been going there for years. I tell others it's a great shop, they should go sometime. Other people call me weird, and make fun of me for going to that shop. They'd never go there, because it doesn't sell what they need and it's too far away to go regularly. An express version (y'know, like the babby tesco expresses) of that same shop opens up nearer my house, and I am happeh. It still sells the things I need, maybe a few less, but that's ok, because, it looks great, and its nearer, more accessible.
Then, I go in the shop one day, to find out that everyone who's made fun of me for going in that shop when it was far away or didn't sell what they needed, is now in there, and ranting and raving about how fucking good this shop is, why didn't they go before.
Can you understand why I'd be pissed?

Everyone and their grandmothers is on the skyrim hype this week and last. And that annoys my tits off. Because it's somehow because the hipster cool thing to play it. Why!? None of you shitheads knew anything about Oblivion, let alone morrowind. I used to get called a faggot for signing off the shitpiece of gaming that is COD4 to play oblivion instead, back in the day. Also, are any of these casuals playing properly? Like actually developing characters, exploring, side-questing? Or is it just everyone rolling the default presets, not bothering to customise your character, and hammering at the main quest with a draconian sense of direction, using fucking prima guides!? Prima guides!? Why don't you just fuck off back to COD if you're going to use them, they don't have a place in the sandbox genre. And they're playing it on consoles. I won't get started on that or I'll be here all night.
Why has it suddenly become acceptable to play Skyrim? Because they simplified it so much you could train a monkey to play it, and now nobody has to deal with the intimidating numbers?
Look, all I'm saying is, everyone needs to jump the fuck off the horse-drawn bandwagon before you make it crash and burn. The fact they removed a shitton of valuable, game-making skills and just completely ditched attributes from the series just to get this new audience of prima-guide gobbling cunts half interested has really, really, awoken some serious nerd rage in me.
Just because MW3 was a rehashed donkey-dick sucking piece of shit, that doesn't mean you should be coming over to my games, console peasants, acting like skyrim is the best thing since slice bread. Educate yourselves. Go play Oblivion, or Morrowind if you have the balls and you're not a graphics fag. This shits always been around, and it's been better before.

Also, Lewis; I thought the end of space marine was ridiculously disappointing too. Nemeroth should have been a boss like the Ork warboss, but bigger and better. As a WH40K fan, my mind was boggled, and pissed. If Titus was of such prowess to have done the things he did, if he really had been a heretic who was warp touched, he could easily have smashed the small inquisition force's faces in. On the contrary, there was no fucking way a regular space marine could have taken on a half chaos prince like Nemeroth, regardless of the free-falling advantage. It would take squad of 5-10 marines. Also, did Leandros contact the inquisition? if not, it would have been impossible for them to have known. If they had however, that actually would have happened. The inquisition are cunts of 40k, who'll just blow everything up at the slightest touch of naughtyness. Great game. Wank end.

Also "Metal Gear Solid (The Original Good Ones)" - Not counting the slightly weaker PSP entries, 1, 2, 3 AND 4 were all solid (badum-tsh) games. Really.

@ Oli: fuck you, I've told you I'm not paying for that, why don't you buy a new one with the money you'd spend on getting faggot-ass snake bites instead you filthy hipster cuntjob. You'll look a tool, you don't have the face for it, and you've just gone waaay wrong mate.

That's it. My rants are over. I'm fucking done. Here's a little picture to illustrate my feelings throughout this whole textual adventure.



Merrynight.

Hello dear old chaps and chaplets

Good day sir!
Its olivio! Because thats now my name!
In response to mr zelly (lewis) theres nothing going on between me and sam( thats if ur not counting the several years of growing sexual tention)
I just thought it would be funny to mock him! He DID break my USB stick after all. A crime most Hellish.

AND YOUR BUYING ME ANOTHER TRAMP MAN. (thats another usb, not a new tramp... Not what happened with the last)

Anyway! I've a pretty swell day n'all. Went to college, did sod all, went home, did sod all. And theres strikes tomorrow so HURAH! PRAISE THE LAAWD. fuck of jesus lady.
It's my bumfdumf on friday, or 'birthday' as you may know it.
Speaking of which i think i shall go get snake bites this weekend, and then play the shit out of skyrim! Hurah x5
Anyway, i shall now be of!
Good day sir.

I SAID GOOD DAHY SAARH!

Update of my faggotness.

Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww CMON!
Whats going on with Sam and Oli?! Fuck.
Grow up please. THIS IS A FAMILY FUCKING BLOG!
At least write something with some purpose. Just like I'm about too.
Today I prestiged on MW3. In just 18hrs:47mins. I think thats quite an acomplishment.
I've enjoyed the ride... I'm probably not going to play it again until new maps come out...
I also finished Space Marine last night... Anyone who's played that think that the ending was really fucking disappointing. That boss battle was a joke. Its not a boss battle if it takes less than half an hour too do. Example: Shadow Of The Collosus. Final Fantasy. Metal Gear Solid (The Original Good Ones) I'm enjoying playing Battelfield 3 at the mo'. I;m not sure whats going to happen at the end of that. Still need to do the Batman games.
Anything else?
OH YEAH!
I ordered so many games today. I'm such a massive faggot. Some of these games include;

Deus Ex : Human Revolution
Mariokart7
Skyrim
Duke Nukem
That new pokemon rumble thingy.
Saints Row 3
Rage
AAAAAANNNNNDDDDD.....
Shadow of the Collosus.
I also Ordered Deaden, possibly the best fucking film of all time. Might have to get the Ladz round and get drunk and watch it with meh. SHOULD BE GOOOOOOOOOOOOOD.

Picture unrelated.

To whom it may concern.

Sam is a tramp fucker. That is all.

Media... Continued

Oli and Sam are having a bit of a domestic. Mainly because Oli is bare PMS'ing all over the place like a little bitch.
JKOLI. But Yeah, Oli is PMS'ing because Sam broke his memory stick with his massive tramp legs. Which is just what he does.
So now, I'm sat across the room watching each other bitching at each other. I am sat across the room because I got here 1 minute late and my chair was already stole. Some people eh? DAFUCK?!
I love Ainsley Harriot.
That is all....
LEWJSZINFISDADfklsDLSLADFN.

Media.

We're in Media.
That is all....

Guess Who's Back... Back Again.

ITS ME YOU FUCKING CUNTS (Lewis.)
I've been in the Gay capital of England for the weekend. Brighton. S'been good. Some right good shops down there. I tried Snuff for the first time and it made my nose bleed. I'm writing this whilst eating some Mento's. MMMMMMMENTO'S. They're Nutritiously Delicious!
My Ear blew out again. Because i'm just so motherfucking attractive. Just put all of my Christmas Shopping into my Amazon/eBay basket. I've worked out i need to get 593 in my next wage packet to ensure a happy Christmas y'all.

There was a shop called Pussy in Brighton. Smelled proper yeasty. loljk. But there was a shop called pussy. HERE! HAVE A LOOK!

HAVE A NICE NIGHT GUYS. I'll probably post tomorrow as we have Media and Me, Sam and Oli(WITH ONE I) will be together.
Hope you all have nightmares.

ANAL RUPTURE.

Good morn/afternoon chaps! (its oli....again)
This blog actually has nothing to do with the rupture of anus' but it caught your attention and i quite like the word 'rupture' ..... Mmmm.... Ruptureee.... RUP. TURE.
I am sat in my house having just eaten noodles on bagels. Meal of champions.
And now im letting it settle by watching a jml advert for 'shower feet'
Only £9.99 from asda, a small price to pay for the joy of having beautifuly smooth feet. My mums partner has also unblocked the internet forever now so i've spent the last 24 hours masterbating, continuously. I garentee
I'll have wankers cramp by sunday, the deadliest of all british illness'. And now plannets funniest animals is on and i am way more exited than i should be by a fox jumping on a trampoline o.o i think i need to sleep. And a cuppa' in my stolen starbucks mug (Y) thankyou amy, forever setting an example for your brother.

NAZI MAN

Heeeyylooo! (it's oli)
Today were discusing the effects of exesive mint taking, mainly, shitting. Alot. < this was from earlier today. Now its night times.
In responce to sam, and people who read his last blog, i never actually said that about the smiths and am quite confused as to where he aquired this information. Oh well, you still look like a troll face sam. You 'erd.
Why do i also seem to get ganged up on? Guess its cos dey B so jelly of how amzin i am n' dat.
Oh yes, now going back to the title of this blog, i discovered recently that the rather disgusting substance known as as 'Marmite' was invented by german scientists during the war. I smell. NAZIS. or maybe thats just sams bedroom. Full of cum tissues dont'cha know...... Anyway, must be of, the mints are taking their toll in my downstairs poop deck. 'TATY BAI'

Sam Is an AIDS Clown.

HOW DARE YOU SIR! I did not text you TELLING you to post on the motherfucking blog. I merely asked 'Y U NO BLOG?!'
To which you blogged. Blog blog bloggity blog blog blog.
Have you sucked a dick yet? HA! Its Lewis. The one that talks about shit. I just did a shit that looked and smelled like the water that you drain from a radiator when it needs bleeding. It looked like oil. Whats wrong with my Bowels? Maybe I should look into that.
OLI IS SO HIPSTER, HE SPELLS HIS NAME WITH 2 'I's GROW UP OLI!
Triangle faggotlol.
AIDS.
That is all. Have a nice night all.
LEWJIZZ.

This is totally me by the way.

Slippers, Smiths, countdown, and words.

I'm Sam. I made this blog with lewis. But I haven't wrote in it yet. So Lewis just text me actually telling me to write in it like it's some kind of chore. But I like writing, and writing a lot of shit, so here goes. You've been warned.

The Y key isn't working on my netbook as I'm writing this, so I have to absolutely hammer it to make it put a y.
y. smash. y. smash.
I'd write it on my desktop, but I can't get to it, as I'm re-arranging my room.
I just found a didgeridoo under my bed.
I can sort of play it. Cool.
Countdown's just come on the telly that I just moved, and it makes me want to blow my brains out, completing the redecoration of my room with a new wall colour.
change the channel.
Now it's that fucking John Lewis advert that uses the Smith's Please Please let me get what I want. I'm pretty sure that song's supposed to be about getting love and happiness. Not a pair of John Lewis slippers or some shit. And they're hardly the same thing. Well.
Maybe. But the ad still pisses me off. And it's a shit cover.
On a sort of related note that'll just embarass and piss him off, Oliver is such a hipster shithead that he once asked "Have you ever heard of that new band The Smiths!?"
"new" being the key off-pissing word.
brb finishing room.

Done. Considering the last main entry was about Lewis' doritos shit, I don't think I've done bad by our standards. Although I have just realised that I've just blogged about countdown and slippers and not much else.
And it was the best thing you've read all day.
It'll be even better next time. Honest.

Oh, on this fine evening.

So Yeah. I (Lewis) went to the cinemas today. I like the cinemas. Cinemas are cool bro.
I have an unlimited card lol.
Saw the Immortals. I could tell that the guys who did 300 did it. I'm a cinefile. I just thought that I should mention that.
Hayley Cattell's eyebrows are epic.
Nothing funny to say really, but do you ever get the feeling when you walk into a room and forget what you went in for? Thats the Sims player controlling you canceling your last action. MINDFUCK!
You're still a cunt sam. GO SUCK A FUCKING DICK.

This Morn.

Its Lewis.
I ate a load of doritos last night and did a right sharp poo this morning.
Just thought I'd throw that out there.

IS YOUR BODY READY?

My sisters isn't. As was evident from the Substantially large brick left in the toilet this morning. This is olii by the way.
I'm new here. Sam can still suck a dick.
Not lewis though, hes cuddley and gives me tingles.
I must also add I am an AS media student too, and got a place in this blog by performing many sexual favours for the other lads.
Your slightly queer friend, olii.

WE DIDNT BLOG YESTERDAY

FUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKZ
We should be more persistant with this blogging shit. I'm sat in my photography lesson. Its Lewis by the way. Not Sam. He can suck a dick. This lesson has been eventful. I've been doing triangle faces and the lot.
My xbox broke yesterday. Luckily, I also have a PS3 so Uncharted 3 rescued me from boredom. This is Lewis by the way. Sam can suck a dick. SUCK A DICK SAM!
Email work to Roz. She's is getting mad.
Hayley is sat here. Say Hello Hayley! 'Hello Hayley'
This is standard for this lesson. Oh. I just found out I don't have to come to college tomorrow. So I might actually write a blog that reads well etc.
ANYWAY! BYE!
Faggots,

HAIGUYS

Ello. We as started this blog lol.
We are AS Media students and we do not like media that much.
But we are reyt good at it lolol.
Shut up Matt.
We is going to blog nah. We iz going to be r8 famous innit. Like that gay man off QI. LOL.
Will post later guys.
All the best.
LEWANDSAM!